Stir of Echoes
by yokascruz
Summary: Bosco deals with the loss of someone close to him while finding comfort from a familiar source. OneShot. BoscoCruz. BoscoFaith.


Bosco stood alone, lingering near as everyone finally started to leave. His eyes wouldn't allow him to look down, to look at the coffin now being slowly lowered into the ground. The ceremony was packed with both strange and familiar faces, many had come. Whenever a Police Officer passed, many would come to show their respects, to offer him words of comfort for his loss, but he barely heard any of them. He was numb, rendered unable to even feel any emotion, any ounce of pain or sadness over what was taken from him. He couldn't accept her death or how it happened. He couldn't accept the fact that she was really gone.

"My whole life, I always believed that people couldn't change, you know? It just wasn't possible," Bosco spoke. He didn't need to turn around to know she was there. He felt her presence long before she arrived to stand behind him. "She proved me wrong. She changed—she really did, she did it for me, and for Lettie. She died a different person. "

"I know, Boz—," her voice was hushed, barely above a whisper. "I know."

Bosco remained with his back to her as he continued, "she died proving herself—proving that she was different, that she wasn't the same woman she was five years ago. She was a better person—God, will see that won't He? He'll look pass all her mistakes and see the beautiful person she really was. Do you believe He will?"

"Yes—I do." Her tone was sad, her heart heavy, and her eyes watery.

"I didn't deserve her."

"She loved you."

"She deserved more—more than what I gave her—," Bosco's voice cracked. His hands came up to cover his face as he broke down. His knees went weak, but he knew she'd catch him before he fell, she'd always catch him before he could fall. Her hand reflexively grabbed his forearm while her arm wrapped around his shoulders.

"I can't be here, Faith—."

"Come on—I'll take you home."

Bosco went willingly as she lead him to her car.

_Faith stood watching the numerous bodies being bagged by the coroner officials. The case was brutal, but no worse than she's seen over the years being a beat cop. But as a detective, she had to dig deeper, solve the crime, find the motivate, find the individuals responsible. _

_She glanced to her right, watching as her partner made his way to her. A grim look on his face as he passed the body of a seven year old girl, one of many victims beaten bloody and left to die in the alley. It hit him hard when it was kids, hit them both hard._

"_You okay?" Was the first thing out of her mouth when he arrived to stand next to her. He leaned against the hood of their car and crossed his arms over his chest, nodding but mostly to himself._

"_I'm good." He replied, turning his head to meet her soft gaze and giving her a reassuring smile, "I just got off the phone with Jelly, he says he'll leave this one to us."_

"_Aren't we the lucky ones?" Faith uttered, slowly bringing her hands up to rub her eyes with the palm of her hands. She was tired, being a detective was making her lose sleep. So much horror, so much emotion, good and bad, everything was overwhelming her._

"_You survey the area?" _

_Faith nodded, "yeah. I just wrapped it up before you arrived, six victims total, the oldest 33 years and the youngest—seven, it's a horror show. This man, whoever's doing this, he doesn't care—he picks them out at random."_

"_A seven year old—for Christ's sake. We gotta nail the son of a bitch who did this, Faith."_

"_We will, Boz. We'll get him."_

"Daddy!"

Bosco quickly knelt down and lifted the two and a half year old girl into his arms, hugging her tight. He kissed her cheek as he walked into his apartment. Faith locked the door behind her, following Bosco into the living room.

"I glad you home daddy, I miss you."

"I missed you too, Lettie." Bosco said as he pulled back to look at his daughter. It was like looking into a mirror, her features reflected his own, but her eyes. Lettie had her mother's eyes, "how was my little girl?"

"I was great!" Lettie cheered as Bosco placed her back on the ground. Lettie's face lit up when she looked pass her father and saw Faith lingering behind, "aunty Fay!" She cried running and jumping into Faith's awaiting arms.

"Hey kiddo." Faith managed to say through the lump that developed in her throat. She felt tears fill her eyes as she held Lettie close. Bosco glanced back at them meeting Faith's eyes for a brief moment. The sadness in his eyes breaking her heart. Bosco smiled weakly and walked into the living room where Emily waited, a sad smile creeping onto her face as she saw him.

"Hey, Boz." She greeted softly.

"How was she?" Bosco asked, lowering his gaze so that he wouldn't see the pity in her eyes.

"Amazing, as always. She's such a good kid—we just watched some cartoons and I had her color some pictures from the book you got her last week."

"Thanks, Em."

"No problem—hey mom," Emily said as she watched Faith enter the room a short time after, still holding Lettie in her arms. "I guess I should go. Call me anytime you need a sitter, Bosco."

"Yeah—I will. Thanks." Bosco uttered. Emily nodded, nearing him so that she could wrap her arms around his neck. Bosco at first was stunned by her gesture, but slowly brought his arms up to hold her back. He kissed her cheek softly.

"Take care, Bosco." Emily whispered before pulling away. She kissed her mother on her cheek before heading out of the apartment.

"I need to lay down." Bosco said, looking back at Faith.

Faith nodded her understanding, "go ahead, I'll stay with her." She assured him before turning her attention back to Lettie who had started building a tower with her blocks. For a moment Bosco just gazed at his daughter, biting back the tears that threatened to fall. He sighed heavily before turning and making his way to his bed.

_It had taken a year for Bosco to recover from his injuries and upon his return he was promoted to detective for his display of valor when he saved Faith's life by taking four bullets for her that day at Mercy. It was a promotion well deserved and the new position allowed him to be partnered with Faith again._

_They now shared the same office with two desks facing each other in the center. Life was good, and Bosco's newly established relationship with Sergeant Maritza Cruz had made it even better. It wasn't so much they got back together willingly, it was more of one night of drunken sex lead to Cruz's pregnancy and Bosco's first born daughter which he agreed to name, Lettie, after Cruz's late sister. But after the birth of their daughter, Bosco withheld his misconceptions about Cruz and really believed she had changed. _

_Faith, who had grown quite close with Cruz during Bosco's recovery period, was more than accepting of their relationship and she loved Lettie as if she were one of her own. She loved Lettie the way Bosco had for so many years loved Emily and Charlie. Faith was genuinely happy for them._

"_She's thinkin' of quitting." Bosco uttered breaking the silence. He stopped filling out his report to look across their desks and at Faith._

_Faith looked up from her desk to meet his eyes, "why?"_

_Bosco nodded, "she wants to spend more time with Lettie. Be a stay at home mom. I told her whatever she wants to do, it's fine with me. My salary's enough to—."_

"_What about when Lettie starts school? She's almost three, Boz. You guys plannin' on sending her to preschool?"_

_Bosco looked down at his hands, "Preschool," he repeated softly, "gee, I can't believe how fast she's growing up."_

"_Yeah—it comes and goes pretty quick. I mean, Em's startin' her third year of college already and Charlie's startin' his first year. Em's even got her own place now—got a new boyfriend even, nice boy, he wants to be a doctor. Fred and I are lucky both are kids are smart enough to get full rides from the college, if not, we would've been screwed."_

_Bosco smiled at her, "I miss them—haven't talked to them in months."_

"_I'll tell them give you a call."_

"_I'd like that—so, how was your date with Jelly?" Bosco said, eager to change the subject to her recent interesting love life._

"_It wasn't a date, Boz. He just wanted to go out for drinks." Faith corrected, shooting him a warning look. Bosco just laughed. _

"_Hey!" Cruz greeted, poking her head into their office._

"_Hey, what's up?" Bosco said, a silly smile spreading across his face. Cruz returned his smile with one of her own, but quickly snapped out of it, remembering why she showed up in the first place._

"_Your perp. This killer—well, he made a mistake. We got a witness who can identify him. She's with the sketch artist. They should be done soon." Cruz explained._

"_Thanks, Cruz." Faith acknowledged._

"_Yeah, no problem." Cruz replied, winking at Bosco before leaving. Bosco turned back to Faith, once again dead serious about the case at hand._

"_That's a major break in our case, wouldn't ya say?" He told her._

_Faith nodded as she stood from her desk and grabbed her coat, "let's get down there. If we're lucky we'll catch this guy before he kills again."_

Swersky had told him to take as much time off as he needed, but Bosco returned to work

just three weeks after burying Cruz. He was met with much resistance from the Lieutenant, ordering him to stay home just a while longer, to let everything out of his system, but staying at home was driving Bosco crazy. He needed something to do, he needed to work again, and after a strenuous debate, Swersky reluctantly agreed to let Bosco back into the House.

He was met with warm welcomes from everyone who crossed his path. Though, he's always hated people treating him like he was made of glass, this time around, he didn't care. He didn't even realize how sympathetic everyone was toward him, nothing seemed to matter, as long as he was out of his apartment and doing something to keep his mind off of Cruz's passing. Faith was in their office, the first day he arrived at work. He hadn't even called her to tell her he was planning on coming back, so upon seeing him, her eyes widened and grew quite fearful.

"Boz? What are you doing here?" Faith asked, nothing but concern in her eyes. She stood from her desk and walked over to him where he stood in the doorway. When he didn't answer her, she placed her hand on his forearm, willing him silently to look at her. "Bosco?"

"I'm coming back to work."

"No, you're not—."

"I am, Faith." He stated almost harshly, meeting her eyes with a determined glare, "I already fought with Swersky on this, I'm not gonna fight with you too."

"I—," Faith was almost at a lost for words as she looked at him, "I don't wanna fight either, Bosco, but do you really think this is a good idea? It hasn't been that long—you still need to—."

"I'm fine, Faith." He hissed, pulling his arm free from her grasp and pushing pass her to get to his desk, "let's just get to work."

Faith stood there a moment, contemplating whether or not to push the subject. She soon lowered her head in defeat knowing all too well she wouldn't be able to change his mind. Instead, she sighed to herself before returning to her desk.

"Here's the latest case I've been working on." Faith said as she picked up a manilla folder from her desk and handing it across to Bosco. He took it from her, opening it and quickly scanning through the contents inside, "seems like turf wars are starting up again."

Bosco nodded, but said nothing.

"_This is good," Bosco commented as he studied the sketch in his hand, "we're comin' for you, jagoff. Think you're getting away? Oh, no, not this time."_

"_Bosco—stop talking to the picture." Faith scowled as she drove them through the streets of New York. Bosco had wanted desperately to get out of the House, he was getting rather hungry and food didn't seem like a bad idea to Faith either._

"_I'm just saying—," Bosco started but Faith cut him off._

"_You're talking to a piece of paper, stop it, it's freakin' me out."_

"_Yeah, fine." Bosco gave in, throwing the sketch in the glove compartment before leaning back in his seat. He grew quite as he stared out the window. Faith glanced at him a few times to see if he was angry with her, but he didn't seem like it. He actually seemed content as he stared off into the distance ahead._

"_I'm gonna ask her to marry me." He broke the silence and Faith couldn't think of anything more nerve wrecking than what he just confessed. Her eyes went round as she turned her head to look at him, her foot stomping on the brake pedal forcing the car to a halt in the middle of the road._

"_You're what?" She nearly exclaimed, "you're joking right?"_

"_No, I'm serious, Faith—," His attention was drawn to the angry calls and horns from behind them, "Faith—come on! Let's get out of the middle of the ro—." _

"_Marriage? Bosco—I can't beli—I don't know what to—," She rambled on, ignoring the frustration in his voice to start moving the car again. _

"_Yeah—I know, it's a shock, can we talk about it at the café?"_

"_You brought it up now—Bosco, it's just so shocki—."_

"_Faith, drive the damn car now." He ordered, a threatening look in his eyes. Faith momentarily obliged and continued driving down the street, heading for their favorite little café._

"_Bosco—I—," Faith mumbled while trying to find the right words to say, "congratulations."_

"_Really?" He looked at her, a hint of surprise in his tone, "you really think it's a good thing? You're okay with it?"_

"_Why wouldn't I be? Bosco—marriage, it's such a big step, I'm—I'm just so happy you're finally takin' it. I mean, how long have we known each other? And how many times have you mentioned marriage? Well—like this anyway." Faith smiled at him, "I'm happy for you, Boz."_

"_Yeah?—that's just—thanks, Faith. I was thinkin' about it, you know, after Lettie's two year old birthday party. I was just lookin' over at Ritza and I was thinkin' about how far we've come. I mean, we have this beautiful baby girl, we're living together, we're being parents together, why not just make it official, right?"_

"_Right."_

"_I'm—wow, I'm just glad you're okay with it, Faith."_

A night outing turned out to be a very bad idea for Bosco, who as soon as arriving at the bar, proceeded to down the beers, one after another, trying to drown out his sorrow. The trouble didn't start till after Bosco's sixth beer when he decided to pick a fight with a large group of Harley Davidson bikers because one of them had supposedly looked at him funny. Thankfully for Bosco, Davis and Sully decided to step in, Davis pulling out his badge and telling the bikers to back off.

No soon after that, Davis with much help from Sully dragged a reluctant Bosco out onto the streets where an upset Faith waited for them, leaning against her truck with her arms crossed over her chest.

"Who called you?" Bosco barked, struggling against Sully and Davis who half carried, half dragged him to meet Faith. "I don't want you near me—Faith, just go away."

Faith flinched at his hurtful words, but didn't let hinder her. Instead, she hardened her eyes as she glared at him, "I'm taking you home, Bosco. Let's go."

"I'm not going home—I'm not finished drinkin—."

"Oh, you're finished alright." Faith ordered, opening the passenger's side for him, "get in."

"Like hell I am." Bosco said, trying to turn around, but Sully and Davis held him in place.

"Get the hell off of me!"

"Thanks guys, I'll take it from here." Faith said, smiling from Davis to Sully.

"You sure, Faith?" Davis questioned, reluctant to leave her alone with a drunk Bosco.

"Yeah, I'm good." She assured them.

"Okay," Sully said, hesitating slightly, before releasing his hold on Bosco. Davis did the same, both of them backing up, "be a good boy, Bosco."

"Bite me, Sul." Bosco sneered. Sully and Davis both gave a lingering look at Faith before turning and heading back into the bar. Bosco just stood awkwardly for a moment, his shoulders sagged and his eyes to the ground. More than anything, he looked like a lost, scared little boy.

"Come on, Bosco. I'll take you home."

"I don't wanna go home." His voice was still angry, but Faith didn't care. She grabbed him by the arm and lead him to the passenger side of her truck, practically throwing him in there before shutting the door behind him. With a heavy sigh she rounded to the driver's side.

"_55-Crime Sergeant to Central, 10-13, 10-13, Officer down! I repeat, Officer down! We need a bus to this location, 2nd and Harper, now in pursuit of suspect on foot down alley, requesting back up, suspect is armed and possibly in connection to recent homicides—," her voice was unmistakable as it came through the radio. It sent an unnerving chill down Bosco's spine as he quickly started out of the diner and to the car._

"_Bosco! Where are you going?" Faith demanded as she followed him out of the diner._

"_You heard her—she needs back up, she's got our guy."_

"_Bosco, let David and Charlie handle it, that's not our job anymore."_

"_No—Faith, you heard Cruz. I know that's the guy we've been lookin' for, now let's go!" He didn't mean to shout so loud but he wanted to get his point across and to his relief Faith quickly followed his lead, getting swiftly into the passenger's side as he sped off._

"_55-Charlie responding to 10-13," Sully's voice came over the radio system.._

"_55-David responding to 10-13." Davis answered the call immediately after._

_Both 55-David and 55-Charlie arrived on the scene in mere minutes. Finney stayed with Carlos and Grace as they worked on Cruz's fallen partner whom had been stabbed numerous times in his chest and neck. Davis and Sully were just about to run into the alley when they spotted the two detectives pulling up the curb._

"_Bosco! Faith! What the hell are you two doing here?" Sully barked, seeing the two former beat running to join them._

"_There was a 10-13!" Bosco replied._

"_Yeah—we're the back up. This isn't your job anymore, Bosc—."_

"_We don't have time to argue, Sul. Cruz is still out there." Bosco snapped back and quickly took off in to find Cruz. Davis, Sully, and Faith all glanced briefly at one another before taking off after him._

_The four of them came to a break in the alley, leading down three different paths. Bosco and Davis went one way, Sully went another, and Faith took the last route, all of them calling out in search of Cruz. There was still no sound from her end of the radio, and Bosco was beginning to worry._

_On her own, Faith rounded a corner just in time to see Cruz pinned beneath the perp as he brought his blade down one last time, plunging it into her, ripping the tender flesh. Cruz's scream rang in Faith's ears._

"Where's Lettie? Where's my daughter?" Bosco demanded, opening the door to his apartment and stumbled in after tripping over one of Lettie's blocks. He hadn't really had enough to drink to get completely wasted, but it was enough for him to lose his footing and fall to the ground, "Dammit, Faith! Where is she?!"

"I told Emily to take Lettie home with her." Faith explained, moving to help him. Bosco angrily pushed her away, and getting back to his feet. He cursed as he tripped and fell back onto the ground. "Bosco, just let me help—," Faith said, grabbing at him, trying to help him back up. Again, he slapped her hands away.

"I don't want your help! I don't need you! Get the hell away from me!" He shouted, crawling to the couch and pulling himself onto it.

Faith stood her ground, not letting his words affect her. She knew he didn't mean them, she knew he was hurting, that he was dealing with his pain. And she wasn't about to let him deal with it alone. Not after making that promise to Cruz.

"Bosco—you're just dealing with her loss, it's understandable, but you have a little girl who loves and adores you—."

"Don't you think I know that?!" He cried, kicking at the coffee table in front of him, the contents crashing to the floor, "I don't need a lecture from you, Faith. All I need is for you to give me my daughter back and stay the hell away from us!"

Faith walked to the couch and sat on the opposite end, remaining calm was the best way to deal with Bosco right now, "Boz—look at me." She urged, taking hold of his hand and not letting him pull it away this time. She waited till he met her gaze before she spoke, "I know you don't mean that. All I want is for you to let me in—let me help you. I care about you— I know you—and you know me too, that's why you know I'm not gonna just walk away."

"Faith—," he whimpered, leaning forward, his arms immediately circling her waist as he buried his face into her shoulder, opening himself and letting the tears fall. "She didn't deserve it, Faith—I didn't deserve her."

"Shhh—it's gonna be okay." Faith whispered, tenderly cradling him in her arms.

"I led her on, I let her think we were happy."

Confusion swept over Faith's features as she pulled away slightly, meeting his eyes, "but you were happy, Boz. I know you were."

Bosco shook his head, "no—I was lying, lying to her, to you, to myself—for years. I let her believe something that wasn't there."

"What are you talking about, Bosco?"

Bosco pulled away completely, sitting back down on his side of the couch as Faith patiently awaited an answer. He met her eyes, sadness, guilty, love, all reflected in his eyes as he looked at her.

"She loved me, Faith—," He started, another tear slipping from his eye, "she loved me despite my faults—despite my failures—despite the truth."

"The truth? What—Bosco—," Faith said, moving closer to him, resting her elbow on the back of the couch and gently touching his cheek. "You're not a failure."

Bosco met her eyes again, "but I am," he choked back tears as he continued, "more than anything, Faith—I failed to—I failed—to love her." He brought his hands to his face again, hating himself for being so weak in front of her. "I couldn't—I never—loved her the way—she wanted me to. She died—knowing that I didn't love her."

"She knew, Bosco. She knew you loved her."

Bosco shook his head, "but I didn't!" He exclaimed, "don't you see, Faith. I didn't love her—and she knew that and she still stayed with me. I couldn't love her because—becaus—." He reached out to gently run his fingers along Faith's jaw line and then up to cup the side of her face.

"Bosco—," Faith said, trying to pull away from his touch, but he held her face in place, forced her to meet his eyes. "Boz—don't."

"You—she knew, Faith. She knew—I could never—never love someone else—there could never be anyone—but you." He uttered softly, pulling her forward so that their foreheads rested lightly against one another. "And I hate myself for it now."

Faith finally understood, all the pain and guilt written so clearly in his face since the moment he found out Cruz was dead was because he hadn't loved Cruz the way she loved him. If Cruz hadn't gotten pregnant from her one night stand with Bosco, he wouldn't have hesitated to tell Faith the truth. But now Cruz was gone, and it all brought nothing but shame and guilt to Bosco.

"I don't deserve to mourn her, Faith. She's the mother of my child and I failed her."

"No—Bosco," Faith replied, taking his hands into her own, "you made her happy—she was a better person because of you, because of the daughter you both share. She died knowing that—she told me to tell you that she was happy, in her eyes, you didn't fail."

They gazed at each other for a long moment before Bosco reached forward to take her into his arms, "thank you, Faith. Thank you." He closed his eyes as he held her tightly to him.

"_You son of a bitch!"_

_Faith couldn't stop herself even if she wanted to. The gun gripped firmly in her hand shot off four rounds hitting the perp directly in the chest. He stumbled back a few feet from the impact of the bullets before dropping to the ground dead. His victim still motionless on the ground where he had been standing over her. _

"_Ritza!" _

"_Ah—," Cruz moaned in pain, coughing up blood as she laid helpless on the cold hard ground beneath her. Faith quickly closed the distance between them all the while shouting a 10- 13 over the radio system. She surveyed the damage, blood was everywhere, he had stabbed Cruz relentlessly, the wounds to her stomach was the most painful. _

"_Ritza—," Faith grabbed her friend's hand, holding it tightly. "It's gonna be okay—you're gonna be okay, you hear me? The bus is on its way. Hold on."_

"_I can't—I'm so cold, Faith—."_

_Faith immediately peeled off her jacket, covering Cruz with it as more blood started to trickle from her lips. "I'm here—I'm with you. You're gonna be okay."_

_Cruz shook her head, tears blurring her vision, "I'm not gonna make it, Faith."_

_Faith blinked back her own tears, "Don't say that! Don't you dare say that Ritz—you're gonna make it! Just focus, keep your eyes open." _

"_It's too late." It was getting harder to breathe, blood was beginning to fill her lungs. Cruz coughed a few times and Faith tenderly wiped the blood from her mouth, "tell Lettie—tell her—."_

"_No—no, you can tell her yourself—you're gonna be okay."_

"_Tell, Lettie—tell her that I love her—that I'll always be with her." _

"_No—," Faith's voice cracked as she was helpless to cease the flow of tears running down her face, "Ritz—don't—."_

"_Please, Faith." Cruz begged, her grip on Faith's hand tightening, "tell her for me."_

_Faith nodded, her face a mask of despair, "I will—I'll tell her." _

"_He's—."_

"_Oh, God, Ritza." Faith cried unable to except what was happening. "I can't lose you—he can't lose you."_

"_Faith—he's gonna—need you. Take—take care of—him—for me—you're the—only one—," Cruz gasped, hardly able to get the words out as a single tear slipped from her eye, "please, Faith—promise me—you'll take care of them—for me."_

_Faith nodded, "I promise."_

_A weak smile spread across Cruz's face and her eyes started to lose focus on the face hovering above her, "thank you—Faith. You—Faith, you've—been—so much more—than—my friend."_

"_Ritz—," Faith sniffed, sucking in another painful breath as the woman in her arms slowly slipped from this life. _

"_You're—I love—you—like a sister." Cruz whispered, slowly bringing her other hand to rest on Faith's already firm grip on her hand. "Don't forget—that."_

"_I won't—I'll never forget." _

"_Be happy—and—tell him—I was."_

_Cruz smiled through the pain one last time and with one final breath, the life drained from her while in the distance the echoes of the sirens neared. _


End file.
